I don’t know why I hate it
I wept when the technician left
It’s very light
And yet
It feels like a brick
A constant reminder
I want to smash it against the wall
But I won’t
Not yet…
Tricia 3/9/2014
About triciabertram
I have written all my life. Writing helps me to make sense of a world I often don’t understand. Poetry is my supreme solace, closely followed by literature and music.
When my son ended his life in 1999 I embarked on the most difficult journey of my life, my grief journey. To survive in this unknown, harsh landscape I had to write. It was for me, the only way I could even begin to move forward. Then in 2009 my darling husband died suddenly and so my journey continues. I write about other issues but because of my life experience, grief and death are continuing themes in my writing life. In our culture I believe there is a fear of death, an inability to accept the inevitability of our mortality, and this creates enormous difficulties for the bereaved and those around them.
I have begun this blog in the hope I will create a small ripple in the pond of fear that is currently drowning the reality of death and grief. I will continue to skim the stones of my truth, watch them bounce, and see how many ripples I can make.
Writing the roads of grief 
I can understand why you hate it Tricia, completely understand. How something so small can weigh so heavy and bring forth memories and reminders, is probably something many people would fail to understand. , Maybe the hate will develop into “love/hate” eventually, which is how I feel about all the aids I need now. Although I do still hate the f….ing silly scisdors I have to use becaue Im even getting to weak to use these,the so called “disabled scissors”!! I feel like disabling them often!
Love you my precious friend ❤️ Xxx
Oh the price we pay to maintain our sense of independence.
It’s the symbolism of it all I assume. I hope you’re keeping will Tricia.
I wonder if your pendant is a medic-alert? I gleaned that primarily from the comments above. i’m sorry to hear that you are struggling so much with your own health, Tricia, but it sounds to me like this step is a necessary loss. I hope it feels lighter soon, my friend.