Screensaver


Almost six years
Since she took the precious photo
Part of a series
Documenting
What was to be
Their final journey to Squeaky Beach
Where nine years earlier
They’d scattered the ashes
Of their only child
Squeaky Beach at Wilsons Prom
Was his favourite place
He loved the serenity
Sitting on the sand
Silently watching the waves roll in
The quirk of nature that caused
The sand to squeak
When walked on
His troubled mind soothed
By the sea he loved
The perfect place
For his life’s final ritual
Each year on the anniversary of his death
They’d return
Share stories champagne tears and laughter
Six weeks before the tenth anniversary
Her husband collapsed
Died in her arms
At first she couldn’t bear
To make the journey without him
By the time she was ready
Her declining health
Made the journey impossible
It was only a few weeks ago
She reached a place of acceptance
Her next journey to Squeaky Beach
Would be with her husband
When their ashes were scattered
Together
Until then
She’d gaze daily at her screensaver
Remembering

Tricia 5/2014

Written in response to Pooky’s Prompt
http://pookypoetry.wordpress.com/2014/05/30/poetry-prompt-30-screensaver/

About triciabertram

I have written all my life. Writing helps me to make sense of a world I often don’t understand. Poetry is my supreme solace, closely followed by literature and music. When my son ended his life in 1999 I embarked on the most difficult journey of my life, my grief journey. To survive in this unknown, harsh landscape I had to write. It was for me, the only way I could even begin to move forward. Then in 2009 my darling husband died suddenly and so my journey continues. I write about other issues but because of my life experience, grief and death are continuing themes in my writing life. In our culture I believe there is a fear of death, an inability to accept the inevitability of our mortality, and this creates enormous difficulties for the bereaved and those around them. I have begun this blog in the hope I will create a small ripple in the pond of fear that is currently drowning the reality of death and grief. I will continue to skim the stones of my truth, watch them bounce, and see how many ripples I can make.

Posted on May 31, 2014, in Poems. Bookmark the permalink. 14 Comments.

    • Thanks Louise. You know I nearly didn’t share this one. I sometimes feel I’m constantly rewriting the same story and maybe I am, but it’s what keeps coming up for me. x

  1. A wonderfully poetic idea. I hope it works out for you.

  2. Oh Tricia, I wish you could get there – it sounds beautiful (and looks beautiful) I’m intrigued to know more about how you feel when you see this image. Is it more about happy memories of Rod and Ken, or sadness at Rod’s death or regret at not being able to make the trip or any one of a number of other things?

    As ever you wrote so prefectly and stirred me all up inside. I’m just off to give my girls superfluous cuddles and kisses now. I’ll give them kisses from you and Big Ted too xxx

    • Pooky, I experience a myriad of emotions when I look at this image. It depends if grief has snuck up and smacked me over the head, if I’m tired, if I’m at peace… I can experience all the things you mention, and more; sometimes all on the same day. 🙂 I guess I can explain it best by writing what I said to my carer this morning “No matter what emotions I experience on any given day, I’d not wish any of them away because they are the ultimate expressions/consequences of having loved and been loved. The loving is worth it all.”.
      Hugs xx

  3. paulineclarke

    That is an amazing poem. Its an amazing story.you shine sweetie.

  4. This is such a moving poem Tricia and one to treasure. Squeaky Beach sounds wonderful and so are you my lovely precious friend ❤️ Xxx

    • Christine, as I wrote to Louise, I almost didn’t post this one on the blog, but I’m now glad I did. Squeaky Beach is a beautiful place. It’s part of Wilsons Promontory National Park, a truly amazing place on the southern most tip of the Australian mainland. If you google Wilsons Prom you should get some lovely images. At sunset all these beautiful little critters come out. It’s magic.
      I’m so pleased you enjoyed this my precious friend. ❤ xx

  5. As the youth of today would say “All the feels!” Tricia. So many emotions from this powerful piece. And still beautiful and serene. Hoping that is how you are feeling today. xx

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